Educational Contracts

This has been one of those school years when it's been hard to feel like we've gotten out of "survival mode." OK, let's be honest, all 5 school years have been that way so far.
I have a very strong-willed eldest and youngest, and a middle who seems to be spending an increasing amount of time getting down on herself and complaining that she "can't."

I hit a wall yesterday when the eldest told me flat out that he would not recopy his essay. He tried negotiation first, of course, and whining, and black-mail, and deal-making. I insisted, explained, and threatened. Finally, when it was clear I wasn't going to budge, he just flat out refused.

I decided that I needed a time-out before I lost my own cool more than I already had. By the time I came back from my quick walk, I had moved (slightly) from imagining punitive writing assignments to clarifying in my own mind exactly what I wanted him to understand about his role in our little school. Thankfully, he had bowed to the inevitable by the time was ready to deal with him again, so after I got him set with his revision and recopy, I spent a few minutes writing up this educational contract.

An Educational Contract

The teacher’s job is to instruct, correct, and assign work as she deems necessary and appropriate for the student to attain mastery of the subject. A good teacher will understand her students’ unique personalities, strengths, and weaknesses, and use creativity, variety, and fun to challenge and inspire her students to do their best. She will not forget that they are students, not masters, and thus will treat them with patience, encouragement, and respect even when they do not perform perfectly. She will not allow them to be lazy, disrespectful, or overly discouraged. Instead she will be their cheering section when they are cooperative and attentive, their helper when they are struggling, and their compassionate but firm disciplinarian when they do not uphold their end of the bargain. 

A student’s job is to listen, think, ask questions when appropriate, and humbly accept correction as part of the path to mastery. A student should respectfully and obediently perform tasks and assignments as given. Argument, most negotiation, rushing, shirking, complaining - not to mention outright refusal of work - are unacceptable for a student. The good student submits to his or her teacher’s rules, instruction, and assignments, even when the reasons are not immediately clear. Like the teacher, good students do not forget that they are students, not masters. They treat themselves with patience when they fail to understand or perform to their own standards, keeping in mind that mastery of any subject takes time, effort, repetition, and even occasional failure. Determination and willingness to try again even when the skills do not come quickly are important marks of a good student. 

When both parties adhere to this contract, learning - both academic and character  - cannot help but occur. 

We, the undersigned, agree to abide by this contract. We understand that penalties can and will be assigned when and if the contract is breached, and agree to accept them with as much humility as we can muster. 

Teacher: __________________________________________   Date: _________

Student: __________________________________________   Date: _________  

This morning I shared the contract with all three kids, discussed it, and then asked them to sign it. We filed it at the front of their 3-ring binders for reference, where we can refer to it later if when things start to go wrong. 

(Want a printable copy? Download here)


Look, I don't expect any miracles in my kids' behavior based on this little piece of paper. As I explained to my son - while he busily looked for loop-holes and nit-picks and basically did his best to use up all my good will - it's not like I'm giving them a Choice about this. They're far too young to opt out of any teaching. In any case, the true behavior change I want comes only from the heart by help of the Holy Spirit.
But there's probably some value in clarifying expectations and giving them a peek into how I understand my own responsibilities.
There's also value for me, as this both reminds me that I Don't get to "phone it in," and also that part of my responsibility is to not tolerate endless arguments and whining.